A couple of weeks back, I put out my list of Five Things Mexicans Could Teach Americans. This week, the gringos are returning the favor. Enjoy.

(1.) How to govern. Let on to an American that you are a political science major, and they will snicker and ask what you do with that in the “real world.” Let on this same fact to a Mexican and you might just get a really weird “why the hell would you actually study those pendejos” sort of look. Fact is the Mexican government, and state and local governments, are wildly corrupt and barely effective until proven otherwise, and everybody knows it. But before you guilty liberals start ranting on about Halliburton and campaign finance reform and other problems with the American political system, consider this: Cities in America generally spend their money on cops, transportation, public transportation, water, sewer, and parks. And by God, that’s generally what we get. My town in Michoacan has easily bribable and therefore ineffective cops, poorly paved roads with few traffic signals or even signs, undrinkable water, sewer systems that can’t handle toilet paper, and one or two microscopic parks. Public transportation is great and effective, but it’s only regulated, not run, by the government. The American system is by no means perfect, but its problems are the envy of much of the world. We launch a human cry, and rightly so, when our government tortures foreign nationals. Meanwhile, Mexicans quietly worry that their own police and military authorities will torture them. But this doesn’t make too much news internationally, and even here is confined to the backpages of newspapers and to the Amnesty International Website. Why? Because it’s routine. Another thing not widely reported for being so routine: killing journalists. Mexico is one of the most dangerous places to report the news in the world. That doesn’t do effective government any favors either.

(2.) How to make change. This is not the sort of lofty Barack Obama change. It’s literally change, as in, I want to buy these fish tacos for 40 pesos and pay for them with a 200 peso bill. Sorry, no can do! For some amazingly strange reason, in a country where just about everything save big grocery stores and first class bus lines operate on cash, change is obscenely difficult to come by. Vendors simply don’t have the money in the tills. That taco buying experience was a real one out of Guadalajara, and actually happened twice in two days. The other day a friend had to borrow 20 pesos off of me so he could pay a taxi driver that couldn’t change a 50. And once, in Puerto Vallarta, I did the same for a friend trying to buy a 15 peso bag of fruit with a 20. The last time I was unfortunate enough to own a 500 peso note, I started to get that uneasy feeling that usually comes when you don’t actually have any money. Let the irony of that one sink in for a minute. But change is no problem in the US. A few convenience store clerks might get annoyed if you pay for a pack of gum with a $50, but generally a $20 is no problem. And if you are actually spending some money, say, $25, go ahead and pay with a $100. They won’t mind. One very real Mexican advantage we must mention: the bus drivers give change, unlike basically every bus driver in the states.

(3.) How to be civically involved. French wonk Alexis de Tocqueville nailed this one over 150 years ago in his book, Democracy in America: America is a nation of small groups. From the Rotary to the Elks to the public radio station to the neighborhood association to the friends of the library to the citizens committee for this or that to the church budget panel and the PTA, we love them and participate heavily in them. Mexicans, (and the rest of the world, for that matter) not so much, and it is their loss. Citizen involvement makes organizations better, and those organizations make life better. They provide useful services, check the power of government leaders, the government in general, create more informed voters, and serve as a training ground for tomorrows political leaders. American city councilors and mayors, by and large, do not come out of party machines. They come out of these small organizations.

(4.) How to treat the disabled. I’d wager that every country in the world has a long way to go on this one, but America has a lot to be proud of. Here in Zamora wheelchair curb-cuts are a rarity, needless steps are all-too-common, and automatic doors are confined to large grocery stores. None of the transit buses that I’ve seen could accommodate wheelchairs, and stops are never announced verbally for the visually impaired. If braille translations of important signs exist, I’ve never seen them. 

(5.) How to use turn signals. Do we really need to elaborate on this one? Let’s add how to wear seat-belts while we’re at it. One would think that in a country where grotesque car accident photos are routinely printed in the newspapers that people would get hip and buckle up, but apparently not. The two Mexicans I know who religiously wear seat-belts don’t understand it either.

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And again, lest you think this is not an equal opportunity operation here, go ahead and check out America’s roasting with Five things Mexicans Could Teach Americans. Nobody, and no country, is perfect, but Mexico and the United States are good friends in the global scheme of things, and like all good friends, they can learn a great deal from one another. We can only hope they will.